SKYFALL 007 *Some spoilers*

Well, the newest Bond film is finally here and that is Skyfall starring Daniel Craig, Judi Dench and Javier Bardem. Being the 50th anniversary of the 007 films and the 23rd official James Bond movie, this movie was just awesome and everything you've come to expect and more from this franchise.

Four years ago, the disaster known as Quantum of Solace was released. It was the first direct sequel to a Bond movie and the first to use some crew from the Jason Bourne films. Now, having Bond compete or try to mimic a totally different franchise was the first mistake. The second mistake was the fact that they actually did it. Constant unnecessary shaking of the camera to I guess bring a sense of realism didn't really do anything but just say, "Let's destroy 46 years of originality and slap some Jason Borune in there. Didn't work. Skyfall was such a relief and brought things back to the classic world of James Bond that we all know and love with a modern twist to it. The things that made the Bond films so successful is that not only did they retain the feel of the 60s, but also adapt to the modern times. No more people taking over the world; no more unrealistic situations; but more of a focus on the spy genre and drama to the character. Back to the point at hand, Skyfall is up there with the great James Bond films as Goldfinger, GoldenEye and Licence to Kill. There is much story development here and Daniel Craig, although not my favorite James Bond, has really made the part his own and in no way is he trying to mimic Sean or Pierce or the others. If anything, he has a touch of what Timothy Dalton brought to the role: Less time for the ladies and more time for his job. The films starts off with a bang, and of course it must since every James Bond film must have a spectacular opening sequence before the movie starts. And after that the film begins. James Bond and Eve Moneypenny are on a mission in Istanbul to run down an assassin responsible for stealing important files regarding agents in the British Secret Service. Bond finds the man responsible and chases him throughout the city in a spectacular bike chase through the streets of Turkey and ends up with a hand to hand fight on the train. Bond gains the upper hand but M orders Eve to fire a the e assassin and sadly they she shoots the wrong man and Bond falls to his "death" off a bridge. The next day, M writes an obituary on 007 presuming he is dead. Bond, however is not really dead yet enjoying himself on the loose and begins to drink and just grow a beard and not care about his time as an agent. He has basically lost his memory. M's superiors thing she is incompetent due to the loss of the information on the agents and has nods about resigning from the service once and for all. Bond, in Shanghai, then catches up with the man he was chasing earlier on the train and notices that he is setting up a sniper attack on someone. When he fires and kills the target, he spots Bond and then has a fight to the death in which case Bond prevails this time and instead of Bond falling to his death, it's the assassin's turn and falls to his death. Now, Bond meets up with a girl that he spotted near the down target and ends up getting her to take him to the one mastermind responsible for this mess. She takes him to the man, who turns out to be an old member of MI6. Now, that is as far as I'll go with this review. I didn't mean to turn this into a tangent or a synopsis of the damn film, but if you want to know more I recommend you find out the rest in your local theater or just read a spoiler online. But I'll conclude with this: Skyfall is the movie to see if you are interested in a good story; action; character development and suspense. After four years out of the picture, James Bond 007 is back like you've never seen him before!

Father's Day 007 Special

On Father's Day, I took my dad to see both of the Timothy Dalton 007 features that were showing at the local movie house. Not knowing that it would be that crowded, since Timothy Dalton is a very underrated Bond in my opinion, I was dead wrong when I got there. So many people showed up for it and it was pretty cool! It was practically a full house! Now, these weren't the Sean Connery films or anything, in which case I'm sure every seat would have been taken, but still nonetheless it was the Dalton movies and it was just nice to see so many people come and see his movies. Of course when we got there, there was a screaming little girl asking her father, "Daddy, are these scary movies? Daddy? Daddy! Max took my seat!" I was automatically thinking to myself, Now why on Earth would you take your kid to a Bond movie? Especially the dark ones with Timothy Dalton? Anyway, as the feature started, everything took off pretty well and the theater was pretty quiet, including the little girl. I swear, that girl's voice was so loud you could hear it several blocks away! Anyway, onto the experience. Before the movie started, there was a guess star Q&A with former Playboy playmate Diana Lee-Hsu, who had a minor part in Dalton's second film, *Licence to Kill. Talking about how she got the job, she also mentioned how they used her for the opening credits scene. As she was explaining how they had to cover her private parts for the sensor, she explains, "They had to cover my twin peaks [breasts] and my hidden valley [vagina]." Naturally, the audience laughed at her politically correct use of the terms. I mean, there were several little kids in the audience so it was just as well, and naturally they didn't get it. Heck, the kids were probably sleeping by the time she was done with the interview. After she left, the first Dalton film started. The Living Daylights. It was great fun and brought Bond back to the Connery days with a gadget filled Aston Martin. When Dalton was first seen on the screen walking the Gun Barrel, everyone in the audience applauded including me and the first dramatic zoom in of Dalton also garnered great applause. This is what makes a Bond movie so fun to watch in a theater. You are surrounded by fans and no matter who the actor is playing Bond, you still cheer for him. Now, unfortunately I'm not sure how audiences reacted to George Lazenby's Bond, but that's a whole different story that I'm not going to get into at this point. Anyway, after watching The Living Daylights, Robert Davi was another special guest from Licence to Kill. He played Franz Sanchez, the main antagonist to Dalton's Bond. Coming in with a hat and a lot of jewelry, Davi talked about his experience on the film and also talked about his personal carer as an actor-turned singer. Anyway, after the questions in the audience were asked and all that, he started sighing autographs. At this time, it was already like around 10:30 and the movie was two hours and ten minutes, so things had to get cracking. So, while he was signing, the lights went down and we got right to the next film, Licence to Kill. The second film is honestly my favorite of the Dalton movies in that it is far more memorable and the villains are much more interesting. If you do watch this movie, be on the lookout for a 22 year-old Benicio Del Toro as Davi's henchman Dario. Anyway, when the last movie was over, we headed home and it was about 1am. And of course, summer school started the next day but who cares...it was a Bond special! lol **If you're wondering why I spelled Lisense with a "c", it's because that is the spelling the film used. They kept the British spelling for some reason.

The Shining

Now, here is a movie to see. It falls in the horror category however it is far more of a psychological film. The film takes place in 1980 and focuses on Jack Torrance, played by the great Jack Nicholson, and his family. A troubled writer and former teacher, Jack has made a big break in watching over an old luxury hotel called the Overlook for the entire winter. While the entire staff of the hotel leaves for the winter, it's just Jack, his wife Wendy (Shelly Duvall) and their troubled young son Danny (Danny Lloyd) who are left to care for it. Jack is quite happy to have obtained such a great privilege to watch over such a large hotel, however Danny is not so happy to be there. Something strange is going on in his mind and he has visions that tell him something bad will happen if he stays there. Being isolated in the hotel causes Jack to become malevolent and dangerous. What will he do? Will there be death? Why did he really want this job in the first place? My review for the film is going to follow this so just a warning, if you have not seen the movie, please do not continue reading. *** This is by far one of my favorite horror films. Why do you ask? Well, it is not really a horror film, but in fact more of a psychological thriller. I guess when Stanley Kubrick made this film, it just fell under that because the author of the book, Stephen King is a horror novelist...for those of you who did not know. Opening up in a long stretch of road, we see a yellow VW Beetle driving all alone through winding roads up along the Denver, Colorado mountains. It is just chugging along and seems to be getting good speeds actually. This is when the credits roll and there is some very creepy music in the background. It really fits. It makes you feel uneasy, as what most Stanley Kubrick films do. Slowly getting closer to the bug, you notice that it is driving quite fast. It is determined to get to it's destination and whoever is driving it will push it to the limit until it gets there. Eventually, it arrives at a hotel up in the mountains. The Overlook Hotel. At the interview, the manager, played by the late Barry Nelson, tells Jack Torrance that it can be stressful to look after such a big place over the winter. He tells him how in 1970, there was a couple that came to look over the hotel. A couple with their twin daughters and "at some point he must have had a complete and mental breakdown. He run amok, and murdered his wife and kids." Jack seems taken aback by the story but assures the manager that "it's not gonna happen to me." Foreshadow!!! When the family arrives at the hotel, the first few days are pretty good. They have all this space to run around and do whatever while Jack can finally relax and work on his writing in peace and quiet. Danny and Wendy meanwhile explore the outdoors and check out the huge hedge maze in front of the hotel. Eventually, as days ago on, Jack does not work on his writing but instead lacks sleep and begins to grow facial hair. Something is seriously wrong when he and Wendy have an argument. Apparently Danny was found with a torn shirt, and given the past accident that Jack did to Danny when he came home drunk, she automatically assumes it was he who did it. Jack, stressed about it and just wandering the great halls of the Overlook, and eventually ends up in the Gold Room. The Gold Room is a great ball room that is the place for many guests, of the elite no doubt, to come and party. Anyway, Jack sits at the bar and says that he would "do anything for a drink. I'd sell my goddamn sole, for just a glass of beer." He seems to get his wish because once he looks up, there is a malevolent bartender whom he addresses as Lloyd, and suddenly asks for a drink. Jack says, "Hi Lloyd! A little slow in here tonight." Lloyd replies, "Yes it is Mr. Torrance. What'll it be." And Jack, not in the least bothered by seeing this ghost, says, "Well, I just happen to have two 10s and two 20s in my wallet." So, paying Lloyd Jack then takes down the drink and feels so relieved. He has the eyes of a demon. Explaining his problems to Lloyd, Jack then looks down and then all of a sudden Wendy runs up to him saying that Danny is in trouble and that he saw an old lady in a bathtub trying to attack him. "Are you out of your fucking mind?!" Then, Jack goes and has a look in the room. Nothing is there but then all of a sudden when he looks in the room, he spots a gorgeous women stepping out of the bathtub and walk towards him. He stands in amazement and they begin to make out. Then, when he opens his eyes, the gorgeous woman turns into an old hag and just starts laughing at him. When he returns to Wendy, she asks him if there was anything in the room to which he replies, "No." Then, he begins to tell Windy that Danny might need some help. When an argument ensues, Jack becomes much more distant and is practically never seen by Wendy or Danny. Eventually he is just by himself in this massive hotel and then comes across the man who had killed his family and himself previously. Delbert Grady is his name, and he convinces Jack that he must kill Danny because Danny has a special gift known as the Shining and that the ghosts of the hotel do not like that he must be "corrected." The same goes for his wife. So, Jack become possessed by the ghost and goes on a killing spree. This is when Jack snapped and becomes just a malevolent killing machine. "No sir, not gonna happen to me." In any event, Danny and his mom run for help and try to escape, however every possible attempt does not succeed because the ghosts tell Jack what to do to block all the exits. It's also snowing outside so there is no one to help that for miles and miles and miles since the hotel is on top of a mountain. Eventually, Jack goes outside and is hunting for Danny with an axe in the hedge maze. While Jack is able to find Danny thanks to his footprints in the snow, Danny gets the upper hand and makes marks with his feet confusing Jack and eventually he escapes with his mother and Jack is left for dead. The next morning, Jack is frozen alive. So, this is the story of the Shining. There are of course many more details and events that I may have overlooked but this is just the general gist of the film and why you should see it. This is my favorite Stanley Kubrick film. Read on and please comment below!

P R O M E T H E U S

WHAT A FUCKING LETDOWN! I was so disappointed with this movie. I mean, damn...A film in a genre that hasn't been touched by Ridley Scott since his epic 1979 classic, Alien, you'd think it would be something great! But, it was just dry... I guess my expectations were just too high. But yeah, this movie was going to be the major comeback to the Alien series of films. Although this film is not a direct prequel, it is obviously still in the same universe as Alien and it was going to explain a lot of the unanswered questions that were raised in that film. Now, having this story take place about 100 years or so before Alien, this is basically the back story of our existence as a human race. Who created us? Why are we here? What is our purpose to fulfill? Well, these questions are to be answered when a ship by the name of Prometheus, is funded to go up into space with a limited crew and discover the secret of the universe. Now I don't care for this crew at all. Mainly because there is nothing really interesting about them. This is so different from the original movie. Now, you have a group of really boring people who are in space mining for ore and don't care about anything other than just getting paid and going back to Earth. It's a job for them. They don't care. In this movie, you have that same type of group, but these people are explorers more or less, yet they are still not really in the mood to explore the unknown. They are just there to be there. We have no reasoning as to why they were the ones chosen or how they differentiate between one another. It is very bleak and bland. Yes, they have differences here and there, but overall you just don't care about this crew. Now, the same thing has been a problem with the Star Wars prequels. What makes the original Star Wars so great, is that it has characters who are funny, interesting and fun to watch. Han Solo, now he is the most bad-ass pilot in space. Who wouldn't want to be him? And Luke? Dang, he sure comes a long way to find himself and we are with him through the three films. As for the prequels? Hmmmm...Obi-Wan? Oh yeah, how interesting and DRY he is. And Anakin? Didn't you just want to kill him to stop him from crying every fifteen minutes about being held back? Anyway, back on the topic. My point is, the characters in this film are just uninteresting to me. You are constantly reminded that you are watching a movie and you feel like you are watching the film as opposed to being in there with the crew like you are in the first movie. Anyway, back to the story. The crew then discover an alien head and what do they do? They bring it on the ship. Examining the head, it is discovered that it is merely a helmet. Inside that helmet comes what appears to be a very human-like head. Hmm...what's the worst that can happen? The head is suddenly put in a cage and it explodes. Later, on board the Prometheus, one of their crew is then infected and mates with another crew member which in tern impregnates her with an alien from the planet. She has it in quarantine and we don't see it until much later in the film when it has grown and expanded. Now, that is actually getting something. You think the alien is going to escape and wreck havoc among the crew, but does that happen? No. It just stays in that room. The rest of the crew just sit around not doing anything and basically one crew member turns out to be a robot and it is his mission to sabotage the crew. This is what happens in the first film. I'm telling you this is like the same movie just more modern with a younger crew. Now, as for the effects of the film, they are spectacular! The sets really bring that vibe from the Alien film, if not in a big more modern way. The computers are of course more advanced even though it takes place before Alien and the atmosphere on the planet is just so realistic. For that, I will have to give the film props. But, unfortunately, effects and graphics can not make up for a poor script. I recommend anyone see this film so they can have their own interpretation of it. I would love to get your responses.

Men in Black III

Wow, who would have thought a film series that was left off with such a bad film ten years ago would have been able to redeem itself to the style and design of the first movie that came out 15 years ago?! Earlier this morning, at around 12 midnight I went to see the premiere of Men in Black III. I was very impressed by the direction and attention to character and detail in this one. As usual, Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones are a great match and it's nice to see them in the big screen together again. When we last saw the MIB, Agent J had restored K's memory and they both continued to fight to protect the Earth from the scum of the universe. The one dimensional character played by Lara Flynn Boyle was as forgetful a villain as ever. I honestly, found her to be annoying and not essential to the plot...mainly because there was no plot in the second film other than just telling the first film over again and playing it safe. Gone are those annoying worms (except for a few small scenes), gone is Frank the Pug (except for a portrait of him in J's apartment) and gone is Tony Shaloub and Rip Torn. You do however see a glimpse of Lady Gaga on one of the screens at MIB. It's pretty funny. And don't get me started on Andy Warhol! Great stuff! I had high expectations when coming to see this movie and I sure was not disappointed!

The plot takes place in the year 2012 and K and J are still working for the MIB. Sadly, Rip Torn's character is not in the film. But, as with most films that don't have the return of a recurring character, Zed has passed away so there is a nice little memorial service for the character. This, I have got to say is something that has been used a lot. When Roy Scheider's character from Jaw 2 was not seen again, his character's death was explained away in Jaws: The Revenge.. In the latest Indiana Jones flick, Sean Connery's character passed away, and in the movie Rip Torn's character has passed. Mind you, in reality, all of the actors were/are still alive but just did not want to be involved. Zed (Torn's character) has been replaced by the ever elegant and talented Emma Thompson, who did a superb job. Her role in the film very much reminds me of the way Judy Dench portrays in the Bond films. Something goes wrong at a detention colony on the moon. An alien has escaped and wants revenge on Agent K for something that has happened to him 40 years ago. It is up to J to fix the time line and set things right. TIME JUMP! It's quite original really and something that I had never expected to see in this series. Now, to be honest when I found out that Tommy Lee Jones' character was going to be replaced by Josh Brolin, I was a little disappointed. Yes, I know Jones has gotten older and all, but he is still Agent K. This story, however sets things right and the younger K, played by Brolin, is actually believable to be a younger version of Jones! Not only do you get to see Smith in the 60s, you also get a great back story of Tommy Lee Jones' character. I swear, out of all of the movies you learn more about Agent K than you do about J. But it works! The movie is action packed, entertaining and has a lot of great surprises along the way that brings back memories from the past two movies. I would have to say that if you only saw the first movie, you could just skip right to the third movie and not miss a thing! This harkens back to the original because it has just the right amount of humor, emotion (which was void in the second movie) and character development. It's entertaining for the kids and also for people who enjoy a good flick that is worth seeing over and over again. I am glad they waited this long to be honest. It paid off.

Jurassic Park III

Here we go, they finally made a third film to the famous Jurassic Park franchise with Jurassic Park III. Starring Sam Neill, William H. Macy and Tea Leoni, this movie, while enjoyable, turned out to be a downfall for me in the Jurassic Park series and the following will explain why I think so.

Having two great films with Jurassic Park and The Lost World: Jurassic Park, they decided to make a third movie which had no novel ahead of it nor having it be directed by Steven Spielberg. Taking place four years after the events of The Lost World, we return to Isla Sorna, InGen's Site B. Eric Kirby and his step-father are para-sailing in the illegal restricted zone of Isla Sorna for a tour of the island to see if there are any dinosaurs near by to get pictures of. Naturally, something goes wrong and the ship is attacked and both of the para-sailors land on the island. Hmm...I wonder what is going to happen. Don't you? Do I sense B-movie territory?

Back on the mainland, we are reunited with Dr. Alan Grant, survivor of the first film, and his old flame Elle Sattler, who is now married with two kids. Explaining his continued fascination with Velociraptors, he freaks her out by talking about them again and if she "remembered the sounds they made." Anyway, after he leaves dinner with her and her husband, he goes ahead and talks at a university about his new theory of raptors, to which no one really listens and eventually gets up and leaves before he can finish. Not doing a very successful job, he can't raise enough support from people to preserve his dig site in Montana and tells his new assistant Billy Brennan that they have to pack up in three weeks. Anyway, as they get some new information regarding the raptors, a man by the name of Paul Kirby comes in the tent looking for Grant. Telling him that he has a proposition for both of them, he invites them to dinner.

Okay, so where does he take them? He takes them to what appears to be Grant's hangout bar. Ordering drinks, I guess the idea is to get Grant drunk to agree to take them over to an areal tour of Isla Sorna. Grant agrees eventually when they write him a check for as much as he wants in order to refund his digging site.

Now, we are on our way to Isla Sorna. When they arrive, Grant gives the tour when all of a sudden no one is listening to him. There seems to be an agenda, which we don't know about yet. Anyway, as the group lands, Tea's character, Amanda Kirby, uses a bullhorn to call for someone named Eric. No what do you think happens? We hear a ferocious roar from what seems to be a large dinosaur. With everyone rushing back on the plane, the group leaves a mercenary behind and doesn't stop for him. Eating the poor dude, the Spinosauras comes out and bumps into the plane, causing it to crash and go down into the jungle, stranded. Grant, reluctant as ever, realizes the truth behind this couple and they are not who they seem to be at all. They are just an average couple looking for their son, the boy who is lost with his step-father at the beginning of the film, and need Grant to come along in order to help them since he has experienced being isolated on an island filled with dinosaurs in the past. Okay, fair enough. It's basically a rescue mission and they take Grant against his will to this island.

Eventually the group split up and Grant is on his own surrounded by raptors. This is actually a pretty good scene. Dr. Grant yet again is surrounded by raptors and awaiting death. All of a sudden, he is rescued by Eric who in fact has been trapped on the island for 8 weeks. Soon the family reunite and then they are chased by what seems to be the new main antagonist of the movie, the Spinosaurus. Chasing them again, the crew end up in an aviary meant for the pteranodon. Something that hasn't been seen before in the series, the crew try to run and escape from the flying dinos. Eventually escaping, with the loss of Billy in the process, the crew then end up on a boat heading to the coast to escape the island. With a final confrontation with the spinosaurus and then the raptors, they escape the island and live happily ever after...How nice.

Now, don't get me wrong, I did enjoy this film when it first came out. But as it grew on me, I realized that it was all just made to get some extra bucks in Universal's pocket. The scrip wasn't even finished when production began and I'm sure they spent all their money to lure back Sam Neill to the role he made famous in 1993. The characters aren't that likable and there is no character development. Just a few jokes here and there. Some are actually quite funny and the actions scenes are good as well, but the movie just doesn't live up to the other two films. It's hard to take it as seriously as you can with the other movies, which is a real bummer. I do find myself watching it from time to time and try to get a different view of it. Some parts of the films are just over used and just seem really cheesy: when the family reunites and then at the last minute, Billy survives at the end of the film. It was just way too predictable. And the most disappointing thing in the movie for me, would have to be the raptors. They are not the savage animals from the first two films, but in face pretty boring and uninteresting. You just don't have that same fear of them that you had in the first two movies.

If they do make a fourth film after all, I hope they will shoot with a completed script and have more likable characters. And make it longer than just an hour and a half!

The Human Centipede

Wow, now this is the movie to see if you are really in for a surprise of something never seen before. The Human Centipede. I have never seen a movie like this in my life! However, I'm glad I saw it and it's not nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be. In this review, I will talk about the premise of the story, the crazy scientist who performed this procedure and the outcome of the movie. If you do plan on seeing this movie, I recommend you not read this review until after.

Okay, the movie starts somewhere in Germany and these two girls Lindsay (Ashley C. Williams) and Jenny (Ashlynn Yennie) are on vacation getting ready to head over to a party. Naturally, they both get lost in the woods when their car gets a flat. Not able to call for help, they end up walking on foot, having no idea where to go. When finally just deciding to go back to the car, both of them get lost along the way. Anyway, with nowhere else to go, they end up finding this house in the middle of the woods and decide to go in. Of course, this is a big mistake...one they will regret for the rest of their lives...

The man who lets them in, is none other than a severely deranged and mad scientist Dr. Heiter (Dieter Laser). At first, everything seems to be fairly normal. But this dude has a plan. His plan is to make a human centipede. So, when offering these lost girls a glass of water, he secretly puts something in the drinks. Meanwhile, as these girls pass out he takes them to a secret lab where he them performs an operation where he connects three human
beings together and make them into a human centipede. As each person is injected with some kind of solution that numbs their entire body so they won't feel the procedure, Lindsay manages to escape and runs for her life. As Heiter is looking for her throughout his house, Lindsay gets Jenny out of the operating room and makes a run for it and carries her on her back. Heiter was there waiting all along and shoots Lindsay with a tranquilizer gun, thus allowing him to continue the procedure. Heiter cuts the knees of the three people, and puts an incision on the mouths of the women so they are connected through the ass of the the ones in front of them. Since Lindsay attempted to escape, she is in the middle. Meaning that she has to consume the waste of the person in front of her, while the person behind her consumes hers. It's quite sick.

Now, these three humans are the pet of this deranged anti-social man. Finally, some cops arrive and ask questions about the whereabouts of these missing people. The man himself acts totally oblivious and does get a little impatient with these cops and just tells them to get out of the house. They return, and eventually hear screaming in the house. Offering a cup of tea to one of the cops, which is of course poisoned and dies. The other, catching on and not drinking anything. His partner eventually dies and has the same reaction that the girls did in the beginning of the film. Anyway, as the cop searches for answers and comes back with a warrant, he now is aware of what Heitner is doing and eventually shoots him, but not before dying himself and falling into a pool of blood.

Meanwhile, while all this is happening, the head of the cenitipide, an Asian dude, eventually kills himself and realizes that it's not worth living being treated like an animal. He slits his throat and dies. The girls behind him are of course scared out of their minds. Jenny, the girl at the end, dies of unknown reasons. I'm guessing it is because she ate shit that was digested twice. In any event, the film ends with Lindsay stuck in the middle of two dead bodies and there is nothing left for her to do but cry. Of course she cannot cry out loud since her face is attatched to this dead person's ass, but she does pant and this is where the film ends.

Wow, this movie really was quite a movie to see. I wish I had seen it sooner than I did, but to be honest, what with all the hype about the film and all, I guess I was expecting far more than I got. But, still, I'm certainly in no rush to see this movie again. Make sure you eat well before seeing this film. It will certainly make you sick. But once you start watching it, you can't stop!

A sequel of this movie will be hitting theaters next month. It's already banned in England due to it's horrid subject matter, but I'm sure just by looking at the poster, there is no need to wonder why. The Human Centipede 2 (Full Sequence) will be released in theaters October 7th, 2011. Stay tuned!